


Not a Victory March

by Saucery



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Awkward Conversations, Break Up, College, Future Fic, Heartbreak, Heteronormativity, Homophobia, Infidelity, Jeff Buckley Inspires Sad Stories, Kid Fic, M/M, Marriage of Convenience, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Near Future, Not My Fault, Original Character(s), Pack Dynamics, Requited but Nonetheless Impossible Love, Social Commentary, Stupid Social Norms are Stupid, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-02
Updated: 2012-06-02
Packaged: 2017-11-06 15:27:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/420389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saucery/pseuds/Saucery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Derek breaks up with him, it isn't a surprise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not a Victory March

**Author's Note:**

> Damn you, [Jeff Buckley](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8AWFf7EAc4&ob=av2e). I love you too much.

* * *

  


  
Art by [Birddi](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Birddi/pseuds/Birddi).  


  
When Derek breaks up with him, it isn't a surprise. What they had going was basically just a heat thing; it wasn't like they even had sex if Derek didn't need to do it on pain of death, or something. And that? Wasn't a relationship. It was just Stiles being convenient and… and convenient, and also having a conveniently constant boner for Derek, so Derek would have to be kind of an idiot to not take advantage of that.

Not that it was - it wasn't _taking advantage_ , not in _that_ way, not in the way Kate took advantage of Derek. It was just - a thing. A necessity. And necessity is the mother of all interventions, right? Sexterventions. Assterventions. And that's what Stiles was. An intervention. An evasive maneuver. Beam me up that wormhole, Scotty.

So, technically, it isn't even a break-up. Stiles is going to college; Derek's going to get a mate. Like, a proper mate. Maybe that wolf from a neighboring pack that keeps showing up with bloody rabbits. Derek certainly seems to appreciate them. Stiles can't ( _won't_ ) bake blood-chip cookies, no matter how much the pack may want them, so. Clearly, an actual werewolf mate is required. That, and Stiles is pretty sure he'd make an awful soccer mom. Not counting Sarah Palin. Who's more awful than anyone, Stiles is willing to bet.

Anyway. He and Derek haven't been dating, so this isn't a break-up. They haven't even kissed, that many times. Mostly when Derek's too exhausted after his heat to do anything but lie there, and Stiles leans in and kisses him to ease him down, and rambles about pointless things like lacrosse and school gossip that don't make any sense, and eventually, Derek goes to sleep. That's -

That's all it is. Was.

"Fine. Fine, so. Er. Are you and - I mean, who'll - with your heat?" Stiles is coherent. He's so coherent, he astonishes himself with his coherency. He's having _vapors_ of coherency. He's about to swoon, right now.

"It'll be taken care of."

Taken _care_ of. Right. Stiles would say something about being careful of Greeks bearing gifts, except that Miss Rabbit-Bearer isn't a) Greek, b) Greek or c) Greek. "Good," says Stiles, and nods maybe a few too many times. "Great."

"Stiles." Derek sighs. _Sighs_ , like this is - what, is he trying to be _patient_? He sure wasn't patient, all those times he _broke into Stiles's room_ and fucked him into the _floor_ , right under the window, because he was too goddamn horny to make it to the bed. "Tell me you understand."

"I understand." Wow, it's awesome how Stiles's voice isn't even a little wobbly. And he isn't lying, so it's not like Derek's gonna call him on it, even if he _is_ wobbly. Which he isn't. "My understanding is so perfect, man, it's the most perfect thing in the _world_."

"You're eighteen. And you're going to college."

"I'm eighteen," Stiles parrots, mindlessly, because that counts as agreement, doesn't it? "I'm going to college."

"You'll meet people."

"People," says Stiles.

"You - you need to. You deserve - "

"Yeah, it's nice how we're both clear on what I _deserve_. But did I deserve lube, that first time?"

"Stiles - "

"Sorry. I - sorry." Stiles breathes. And he _gets_ it, he does. Derek's got Belated Conscience Syndrome, which means he feels retroactively guilty for deflowering Stiles and wants to magically give Stiles a new lease on his virginity. It's only slightly used. Return to sender. Fuck.

No, he's being unfair. Derek - Derek seriously thinks Stiles will be better off having a 'normal' relationship, which, well, Stiles can't even argue with that. And Alphas can't be gay. Or - more like, they can't get gay-married. They've got to sire babies, which, uh, is not so much with the gayness. Unfortunately. Derek's just doing what he has to do; he's always done what he had to do. He never tried to make a move on Stiles when it wasn't absolutely necessary for the heat; he never pretended it was anything more than what it was. He never even tilted Stiles's face up and kissed him, when they were left alone after a pack meeting, and the rest of the pack had gone home.

Derek's never lied to him. Or misled him. Hell, Derek's been beating himself up about touching Stiles, at _all_ , and he wouldn't even have done it if the alternative wasn't going batshit and killing everybody. Stiles was his containment area. His forcefield. His quarantine. And Stiles _knows_ that, and Derek's had enough guilt in his life, already. He doesn't need this crap on top of it. He needs to move on with someone and be happy with someone, and build a pack like the one he used to have, before Kate razed it all to the ground.

That's the big stuff. The _important_ stuff. And Stiles is just… Stiles is fine. He's _going_ to be fine. Plenty of people have ill-advised sex as teenagers and grow up to have happy, healthy, lifelong relationships with the loves of their lives. And Stiles will obviously have a love of his life, because the Stilinskis are _made_ for that kind of thing - commitment, devotion, the whole nine yards. Stilinskis definitely aren't made for crazy werewolf sex marathons at prescheduled times every month, followed by weeks of pretending the other person doesn't even exist. At least, Stiles _hopes_ his dad wasn't ever made for that, because, eww.

"I'm… that's. I'm going to college. You're right. College is where it's at. Frat parties. Homoerotic hazing. Yeah."

Derek's eyebrows climb. They're impressive eyebrows; it's an impressive climb. "I don't know what porn you've been watching, but - "

"You know _exactly_ what porn I've been watching, dude, you've _heard me watching it_. And jacking off to it. Don't pretend."

"I… wasn't always outside your window - "

"No, you were _almost_ always outside my window. Especially on those nights near the full moon, before you - " Stiles stops. Swallows. "Yeah. So. Good luck?" His eyes feel sort of hot and swollen, but they're dry, so that's all right. And, yeah, Derek can probably smell all that sweating misery on him, can smell how clammy and shock-cold Stiles's skin is, like Stiles has just been stabbed, and his body's still catching up. But as long as Stiles keeps it together, _visibly_ , they can both pretend that Stiles is okay, that Stiles has his dignity, that Stiles is actually going to go out there and start dating people when he gets to college, instead of hiding in his room and playing video games and maybe taking up drinking, like his dad.

"Good luck," Derek murmurs. His voice is low and rough and - there's regret there, sure, and that basic _decency_ that makes it hard to hate Derek, even when he's being a douche. Which he _isn't_ , at the moment; this is possibly the least douchey he's been in their entire acquaintance. Because this is Derek, doing the right thing; this is Derek, letting him go. Anyone would say it's the right thing. Everyone would say it's the right thing. Stiles's _dad_ would say it's the right thing, because this whole thing was wrong, to begin with, and Stiles was always too young, he's _still_ too young, and he hasn't even decided what to do with his life. Other than loving Derek. Which - that's a stupid decision. A decision only a stupid kid would make, given that Derek can't even officially mate with a guy, can't have _cubs_ with a guy, can't run a pack with a guy or do… any of those important things. With a guy.

Stiles makes it out of the Hale house - past the couch in the living room that he'd gotten from a garage sale, past the TV that he'd put there, past the packet of Cheetos on the floor, that he and Scott and Lydia had been eating out of, just an hour ago. He makes it outside, and back home, and up to his room, and into the bathroom.

He throws up. Several times. And washes his face. And sits on the toilet bowl. Looks at his hands.

He isn't ever going back there. To Derek's place. He knows it. He'll never be going back. Even if he ever returns to Beacon Hills, it'll be to a Beacon Hills in which the Hale pack is whole, again, in which Derek has a mate and cubs and a couple more Betas and Omegas, because packs tend to grow, once they're started. And Stiles will be… Stiles, a random human doing human things, maybe attending the odd pot-luck night with Allison and Scott and _their_ werebabies, and maybe dating a next-door neighbor type, and trying to make sure his dad's medical insurance isn't ripping him off.

That's that.

He's leaving for college in two weeks, and… that's that.

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written in response to the fact that werewolves probably have stupid things like heteronormativity and peer pressure, too. I wanted to write a story that dealt with these issues realistically (or as realistically as I could with, uh, _werewolves_ ). There are no easy outs, here - no male pregnancy, no conveniently pro-gay werewolf traditions, nothing. Just Derek and Stiles against the world. And themselves, because the world _pits_ them against themselves.
> 
> Don't expect the angst to let up, anytime soon. It will, though. Eventually.
> 
> Like my writing? Check out [my blog](http://saucefactory.tumblr.com/)!


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